Oct. 26, 2020

Anxious Much?

Anxious Much?

In this episode, we talk about anxiety and some tools and techniques to help you fight against it.

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[00:00:00] Mary: [00:00:00] Hello. And welcome today on we do hard things. We're going to talk about why people with anxiety find it so difficult to relax and what they can do to make it easier. Plus, we will tell you how you can help our show. Be more [00:00:15] awesome. 

Yeah, we are. 

Chris: [00:00:19] Okay. We're just being silly now. 

Mary: [00:00:21] I'm Mary Catherine. 

Chris: [00:00:22] I am Chris. Welcome to the show today.

Mary: [00:00:26] Welcome. That intro makes me want [00:00:30] to  go run, which I don't do, or, do a chore. I don't know. go throw the ball.

Chris: [00:00:37] how often do you see me dance? 

Mary: [00:00:39] I love your chair dancing.

Chris: [00:00:40] like chair dancing. Woo. Moving around.

I'm doing the [00:00:45] 80s, like head. Head shift from side to side.

I'm really like just a slow dance guy. I'm not the kind of guy that gets out on the dance floor

Mary: [00:00:53] No. He is.

Chris: [00:00:56] every decade,


Mary: [00:00:57] Yes. Yes, he can slow [00:01:00] dance. nobody's business. 

Chris: [00:01:01] So what up. 

Mary: [00:01:03] what up dog? 

Chris: [00:01:04] Hey.

it's a great day. It's been a great week, I think, or the week went by fast. 

Mary: [00:01:08] Today was like, Oh, so beautiful. 

Chris: [00:01:12] So today is Sunday where [00:01:15] we live, 

Mary: [00:01:16] Day of rest

I guess it's 

Chris: [00:01:16] sunday, most places.

Mary: [00:01:18] it's well, not in Australia yet right now. 

Chris: [00:01:20] true. We do have some listeners in Australia.

Mary: [00:01:23] and in Europe, it's nine, nine time. It's like middle of the night. 

Chris: [00:01:26] That's true. 

if we tried to, we have [00:01:30] listeners that I'm seriously, I'm not bragging. because most of the listeners are listening to hear you. 

Mary: [00:01:36] That's right. I'm just kidding.  

Chris: [00:01:37] Cause you're so smart. and I'm like the dumb guy. 

Mary: [00:01:40] No, that's not true. We're going to have to talk about this later. We're going to break this down later. 

[00:01:45] Chris: [00:01:45] we do have listeners all over the world.

Really. We have people in Australia. We have people in Belgium and France, I saw. Yeah, there's some in Africa. 

Mary: [00:01:56] we're bringing joy to France.

Chris: [00:01:58] I don't know, Maybe these are just, like [00:02:00] bots, robots, or whatever

that are listening to us.

Mary: [00:02:03] We're nice to the bots. 

Chris: [00:02:04] I'd like to think that there are some French people that just dig us. Yes. And of course, then we have people from the U S and Canada. And, 

Mary: [00:02:12] we're Santa Claus lives too. 

Chris: [00:02:13] Yeah in Alaska. 

[00:02:15] Oh, you mean the North pole.

I didn't see that. Is that on 

Mary: [00:02:17] I don't look at our analytics. I just assume people are listening.


Chris: [00:02:21] it's awesome that people are listening.

We're having  alot of fun.

we're hearing from people, but we want to hear from more people. We want to start [00:02:30] conversations with people. We want to get to know our listeners. We want them to get to know us because that's how you build a community. And we want to be able to help people do hard things. 

Isn't that what we're here for?

Mary: [00:02:39] That is what we're here 

Chris: [00:02:40] So we do this podcast. And we try to come up with ideas that will help [00:02:45] people.

Mary: [00:02:45] Right.

Chris: [00:02:46] Not be like us

Mary: [00:02:47] Yeah,

Chris: [00:02:48] we're losers. 

Mary: [00:02:49] Well, 

Chris: [00:02:50] Okay. So I'm a loser. 

Mary: [00:02:52] Well, we actually do this podcast so that we can avoid talking about things because now we go, [00:03:00] Hey, let's save this for the podcast. And then we totally forget where we're going to argue with.

Chris: [00:03:05] isn't it. Great. And now we're so happy.

Mary: [00:03:07] yeah, we're in love.

Yes, as

Chris: [00:03:10] always in love. 

we've been watching a show called Outlander. I don't know if you guys have [00:03:15] been 

Mary: [00:03:15] embarrassed a little bit 

Chris: [00:03:16] No. there are some, sometimes there's a little. Nudity.

Mary: [00:03:21] It's risky.

Chris: [00:03:22] but the overall story.

Mary: [00:03:24] that's why God made the fast-forward button. Yes.

Chris: [00:03:27] it's very, and we don't watch this with our kids, by the way. 

[00:03:30] Mary: [00:03:30] It's embarrassing.

Chris: [00:03:31] but I really dig the show, but I do feel that the main character, Jamie Fraser.

Mary: [00:03:38] Jamie Frazier

Chris: [00:03:39] Makes me feel like less of a husband, because I'm just not as romantic as him. [00:03:45] 

Mary: [00:03:45] I try to.

Chris: [00:03:45] I look over at you sometimes while we're watching the show. and I feel like your eyes are glazed over and I'm just like, I'm just like

a consolation prize.

Mary: [00:03:56] I sometimes when I did it to yet last night, we [00:04:00] were watching the show. And he, Jamie Fraser was saying some things that were wonderful. And so I looked at you and I said, Oh, that's a good one. That's make. note of that. if you were, if it was a book you're reading, you can [00:04:15] underline it. 

Chris: [00:04:15] Yeah, and this tells you how far behind we are too, because I think the show came out in 2010. 

Mary: [00:04:20] I don't know, but

Chris: [00:04:21] And, but we're catching up. 

Mary: [00:04:22] Oh quickly cause. 

Chris: [00:04:24] on season four. 

Mary: [00:04:26] And 

Chris: [00:04:27] we're moving right.



Mary: [00:04:29] we'll. We caught up [00:04:30] soon. Yeah. 

Chris: [00:04:31] And, that's just what we're doing. 

Mary: [00:04:33] Yes. We 

Chris: [00:04:34] don't watch.

a lot. I don't want to say we watch a lot of TV. 

Mary: [00:04:37] Yeah. Cause 

Chris: [00:04:38] have busy lives. you're working on your doctorate. sometimes. go on Facebook. Yeah.

Yeah. That's my, [00:04:45] that's 

Mary: [00:04:45] You just start arguments with people on Facebook. 

Chris: [00:04:48] know, that's why I'm so busy. 

Mary: [00:04:50] Yes. 

Chris: [00:04:51] no, cause I have a job and not that you don't have a job, you have a job to you, but you're also going, you're also going to school and your coaching and blah, blah, blah, 

Mary: [00:04:58] blah, blah.

Chris: [00:04:59] Nobody wants to hear [00:05:00] about all.

the jobs we

Mary: [00:05:01] have. We have jobs.

Chris: [00:05:02] Yeah. I had some 

Mary: [00:05:04] We have lots of jobs, but Oh my gosh. I was going to say something. That's gums is great. Podcasting. 

Chris: [00:05:08] I wanted to bring up the fact 

Mary: [00:05:10] that.

your mom.

Yes. Do you 

Chris: [00:05:13] had that conversation with your mom the [00:05:15] other day. And I was sitting here in the studio and I overheard the conversation. I'm going to set it up.

for you. Okay. 

Mary: [00:05:20] So 

Chris: [00:05:20] you're having a conversation with your mom.

Mary: [00:05:22] I called her. 

and you said. 

Chris: [00:05:24] Hey. 

Mary: [00:05:26] I'm thinking

Chris: [00:05:27] about coming over later today. 

[00:05:30] Mary: [00:05:29] Right. 

Chris: [00:05:31] I will text you. When I decide if I am or not. is that fair? 

Mary: [00:05:37] that's exactly what I said. 

Chris: [00:05:39] And you got off the phone with her. And I said, That seems rude. [00:05:45] would you tell somebody, what. it's a Sunday. I may or may not come over some time today. 

Mary: [00:05:54] Yeah,

Chris: [00:05:54] no. 

A certain time Just 

Mary: [00:05:56] sometimes.

Chris: [00:05:58] Not for [00:06:00] sure, 

Mary: [00:06:00] think maybe.

I think I said, when I'm done eating lunch, I'm going to make up my mind and I'll. And I'll text 

Chris: [00:06:06] basically what you said your mom was, Hey, hold on. Okay. I want you to just stop your life for a bit

while I stuffed my face full of [00:06:15] food. And when I'm done with that, 

I'm going to make a decision on whether you are worthy.

to spend time with me. 

Mary: [00:06:22] know, the quote of the day should be. 

Chris: [00:06:23] What. 

Mary: [00:06:24] Never make a decision on an empty stomach. 

Chris: [00:06:28] That's why we don't, go [00:06:30] to Costco with a full stomach.


Mary: [00:06:32] No empty.


Chris: [00:06:33] yeah. Empty. 

Mary: [00:06:33] Yeah, it's never make a decision. So it's I can't think clear enough before I eat. 

Chris: [00:06:38] Right. 

Mary: [00:06:38] to make any decision, let alone, whether I'm going to drive. That's

Chris: [00:06:41] correct? Yes. 

Mary: [00:06:43] And you responded to [00:06:45] it like that is so rude and we decided we should pull the audience.

Chris: [00:06:49] So we're asking you and please. 

You can respond to us on Facebook, on Twitter, on Instagram at w D H T podcasts. All those [00:07:00] places. 

Mary: [00:07:00] And we might even post a poll on the, we do hard things. Facebook page. Yes. 

Chris: [00:07:05] And you can also go to our website@wdhtpodcast.com. And you can find a

link there, to, send us an email or you can [00:07:15] just see.

Mary: [00:07:15] call into the show. They can, 

Chris: [00:07:16] or you can email me. email us@chrisatwdhtpodcast.com. Or Chris mary@wdhtpodcast.com. Or you can leave us a [00:07:30] voicemail@speakpipe.com. Slash w D H T. Yes.

Mary: [00:07:34] I don't have my own email. 

Chris: [00:07:37] I think you do, 

Mary: [00:07:38] You can email Chris or he can email Chris, Mary. But you sure as. Cannot email. You can 

Chris: [00:07:44] also [00:07:45] email Mary. add WDH T podcasts.com. I think, I can't remember if I 

Mary: [00:07:49] doesn't know.

If she'll get it, don't email me. Chris. Cause obviously he's in charge here. 

Chris: [00:07:54] If it's for Mary specifically, send it to Chris and I'll just forward it on to her

Mary: [00:07:59] At this point. [00:08:00] Oh, my gosh. You're so funny.

Chris: [00:08:02] all. It takes a lot to set all these emails and. 

Mary: [00:08:04] as long as they're Chris centric, we're fine. 

Chris: [00:08:06] you're not actually building the website at all or whatever. mean, why do I have to do everything? And you get your name on it. 

[00:08:15] Mary: [00:08:14] that's the way it goes. 

Chris: [00:08:17] anyways, anything else you want to talk about today? Before we get into our, our main story today? 

Mary: [00:08:22] Yeah, I want to talk about something real quick. Yup. So I'm working on my doctorate. 

Chris: [00:08:28] Argue. I don't know if we've [00:08:30] ever mentioned that. 

Mary: [00:08:30] You mentioned just earlier. but I have noticed that when I get serious, You think something's wrong? all day. 

Chris: [00:08:40] that's because you make weird faces when you're serious. I think, [00:08:45] really weird faces. 

Mary: [00:08:46] I'm supposed to, like I'm in the zone. I have my earbuds in. I'm have the author reading the book to me, I'm underlining, I'm internalizing. I've got all these things going on. I'm doing my work. And you're acting like a [00:09:00] clown. And I'm ignoring you and then you're acting like something's wrong.

Are you?

Chris: [00:09:04] Oh, you're talking about what just happened about 15 minutes ago. Yeah.

Mary: [00:09:07] And then I come sit down in the studio and I'm still in the zone, but I'm ready to do the podcast. And you're like, what's wrong. What's wrong with you? I don't like your [00:09:15] attitude. What's wrong with you today.


Chris: [00:09:17] Here's what happened? You were on the couch. I was in the studio. 

Mary: [00:09:21] I

Chris: [00:09:22] out and you're reading.

Mary: [00:09:24] I was waving 

Chris: [00:09:26] my 

Mary: [00:09:26] arms.

Chris: [00:09:27] trying to get your attention because you had your ear buds in which I don't [00:09:30] understand. I don't understand how you can read and listen to music at the same time.

Mary: [00:09:33] listening to the author, read the book to me. Oh,

Chris: [00:09:35] gotcha. So I was waving my arms. I swear for three minutes and I was right


Mary: [00:09:41] He's gotten a week. 

Chris: [00:09:42] Shad. [00:09:45] I was in your peripheral. Okay. Wow. And you didn't even notice me. 

Mary: [00:09:52] I'm a

teacher. What are you ignoring? Ignoring you. Because I 

Chris: [00:09:55] got closer and closer in. those three minutes.

Mary: [00:09:58] Yup. 

Chris: [00:09:58] And I felt like [00:10:00] you didn't see me until I was standing right in front of you. Five feet away. Yeah. 

Mary: [00:10:04] So the joy of add I'm distracted easily. Okay. But the also the super power of it is. I can [00:10:15] be hyper-focused easily and ignore giant. Chris's. Flapping in the living room.


Chris: [00:10:23] that is something I cannot do. 

Mary: [00:10:26] Now you're jealous. 

Chris: [00:10:27] am unable to focus like that. ever, [00:10:30] I just can't do it. And I don't know. I sometimes think I have ADHD. I've never been diagnosed. But it seems like sometimes I have a hard time. 

Focusing like almost right there. I almost forgot the word.

focus because I lost focus. [00:10:45] Did you see that? I paused.

Mary: [00:10:47] you do per separate on things. 

Chris: [00:10:49] I, yeah, I do. And I think Harrison gets that from me too, because he does it the same thing. 

Mary: [00:10:55] When you guys get stuck on something. Oh yeah. And don't ask Chris a question and just think he [00:11:00] can go. I don't know, like I'm totally fine with not knowing stuff,

but Chris has to find the answer.

He's like a robot and sometimes I'll do it. Cause I needed an answer. And I just, I know that I'll just send it to the robot and he'll find it for me quickly. And then [00:11:15] tell me about it. 

Chris: [00:11:15] It was funny. That's totally true.

It was funny yesterday. Harrison.

and I were putting together the flooring in the garage for our home gym. 

And he and I were both going back and forth.

Is that straight? Is that [00:11:30] lined

up with the

Mary: [00:11:30] I'm so glad I was not here. 

Chris: [00:11:32] It was so hilarious.

because we were both just so focused, not just on getting it put together, but is it straight? Is it. Lined up. 

Mary: [00:11:43] annoying. And I bet it threw you [00:11:45] for a loop because I noticed that the garage is slanted. Yeah. And you were probably thrown off by the slant of the garage. 

Chris: [00:11:54] did mess with us a little bit. Yeah. Yeah.

Mary: [00:11:56] I'm glad I wasn't home. Oh,


you guys are [00:12:00] cute.

Chris: [00:12:00] Yeah. 

let's talk about our topic that I wanted to bring up today. And I'm stumbling through it because I'm a little anxious about talking about it. And let me tell you why. [00:12:15] First of all it's it's about anxiety. 

Mary: [00:12:17] So that 

Chris: [00:12:17] makes, so it makes me anxious to talk about anxiety. But it also makes me anxious because I did some research on this and I found it very interesting. Every where I read all the [00:12:30] things. That can help you get through anxiety or help you deal with anxiety. Are things that I don't do. But they are things that you do

Mary: [00:12:42] So much. [00:12:45] And I was 

Chris: [00:12:45] like, why.


would she could never be anxious.


Mary: [00:12:48] you

Chris: [00:12:48] shouldn't be, you do all these things. 

Mary: [00:12:51] Because. 

Chris: [00:12:52] most part. 

Mary: [00:12:53] And that's why I'm rarely that anxious. 

Chris: [00:12:55] So the first one.

is something. Yeah. 

Mary: [00:12:57] I'm just saying. Yeah.

Chris: [00:12:58] So do you know this, [00:13:00] that you're anxious and that you do these things to fight the anguish, anxiety, the anxiousness.

Mary: [00:13:04] anxiousness. 

Chris: [00:13:06] Or are you just lucky that you naturally do those things?

in New York, which makes you not anxious? 

Mary: [00:13:13] I think I do these things [00:13:15] because of years of listening to learning, to listen to my body. Okay, And I don't like the anxiety feeling that I can get. we all get that. You and I are really good at doing. and so I know that I need to [00:13:30] keep my brain stimulated. And so some of these things are just. 

you will get annoyed if I'm watching a movie with you. And coloring

Chris: [00:13:38] Right. 

Mary: [00:13:39] And. And a number of other things. And And but I do those so that I can focus on the [00:13:45] movie. If that makes 

Chris: [00:13:46] That does make sense.

And. Again, I don't do any of those things. 

And what's interesting. What I found interesting as I was reading up on this, and we know a little bit about anxiety. I know a little bit, because I'm a pretty anxious person.

I don't think I'm [00:14:00] awfully anxious. But I can tend to have some anxiety issues.

if I'm not,

Mary: [00:14:05] If I'm not watching

Chris: [00:14:06] what I'm doing. 

Mary: [00:14:07] Sure. 

Chris: [00:14:07] but some of these different things that help you are things that I. 

wouldn't probably like to do, [00:14:15] I wouldn't like to do. 

Mary: [00:14:16] I

Chris: [00:14:16] like to do, which makes me wonder, can I fight anxiety? What other things might there be out there everywhere. I looked at all these different things and I don't like any of them.

Mary: [00:14:26] there are things you can do that are adaptive. Like the ones we're going to talk about today. And [00:14:30] then there are things you can do to fight anxiety that are maladaptive, like overeating smoking. 

Having sex with strangers, I just, those things are.

Chris: [00:14:38] of those, none of those things sound good, except for the overeating. 

Mary: [00:14:42] you know what, I'm 

Chris: [00:14:42] where I'm at in my life? 

[00:14:45] I don't want to have sex with a bunch of people.

overeat. Yeah. I'm there. 

Mary: [00:14:51] yeah, those are maladaptive things that we can do. and, but the adaptive things are the things that we're gonna talk about today.

Chris: [00:14:56] The first one I thought was very interesting. The one that I saw over and over again [00:15:00] was journaling. 

Mary: [00:15:01] Which is something

Chris: [00:15:02] I used to do, like in my twenties, 

Mary: [00:15:04] A lot. Causes me anxiety. 

Chris: [00:15:07] That causes you anxiety. 

I loved it and I just don't have time to do it anymore. I don't make the time to do it, but I do a [00:15:15] lot of journaling right up here in my noggin. 

Mary: [00:15:17] That'll help you get it out and stop internalizing it. 

Chris: [00:15:20] I think so. It doesn't

Mary: [00:15:21] no. 

To get it out. 

Chris: [00:15:24] that's how I get it out. I think about it. And then I let

Mary: [00:15:27] can you think it What goes through your ears or [00:15:30] something? 


Chris: [00:15:30] comes out of my ears and my pores. And then it's gone. 

Mary: [00:15:35] When you're doing your yoga.

Okay, we'll move on. But I 

Chris: [00:15:38] think journaling is a really good thing.

A really good tool to use, to fight anxiety, because

I know that it helps [00:15:45] with negative self-talk. 

You're able to get that stuff out on paper or maybe even just through talking, you can

Mary: [00:15:51] Yes. Yes. 

Chris: [00:15:52] right? 

So when I, maybe I misspoke when I am journaling in my brain, 

Mary: [00:15:58] I'm 

Chris: [00:15:58] talking that [00:16:00] out. 

Mary: [00:16:00] Yes, you can do that. 

Chris: [00:16:01] In my brain. 

Mary: [00:16:02] Yeah. 

Chris: [00:16:02] In my mind. 

Mary: [00:16:03] The good thing about journaling though, for other people. Cause I don't like it. Is that you can go back. And see.

how you've changed or [00:16:15] your, how your perspective has changed. Or as you're writing it down and then you look at it the next day you realized that how it was and how you perceived it. We're not the same thing.


Chris: [00:16:26] perspective.

may be shifting. As you [00:16:30] write it. And then as you read it, Interesting. I think it's a good one. I think it might be something I'll start up again. But probably

Mary: [00:16:37] Sure. 

Chris: [00:16:39] the other one.

one of the other ones that I found that I thought was interesting was practicing yoga. Which [00:16:45] you could speak to over and over again. And how great yoga is.

Mary: [00:16:49] Oh yeah. 

Chris: [00:16:49] So can Harrison, because you've taken him to yoga as well. 

Mary: [00:16:52] He doesn't like it.

Chris: [00:16:53] Now, but he knows it's good for him, right? So tell us about yoga. How is that something that can [00:17:00] help you with anxiety?

Mary: [00:17:01] I think I've talked about this before, but the body keeps the score.

Chris: [00:17:04] Yeah. 

Mary: [00:17:04] Is a book that really talks about, keeping. We keep our trauma in our bodies. So yoga. Helps release that trauma through your breathing and you're stretching. [00:17:15] And, it lowers your cortisol levels. There's a number of books about the power of movement and your brain and your overall mental health. 

Moving is the best thing you can do. But I think yoga is really great because of [00:17:30] the quietness of it. Like I, I'm not that social. I'm more social than you, but I'm not that social. And I like yoga because it's a place to go do something with people where we don't talk to each other. 

Chris: [00:17:43] But Let me ask you this.

[00:17:45] I've heard. Yeah, there might not be a lot of talking in yoga, but I heard there's a lot of gas involved. 

Mary: [00:17:51] Sometimes or 

Chris: [00:17:53] like today and left and right. 

Mary: [00:17:54] Sometimes, because especially when you're twisting, like if you're in a week, if you're in a binding position where [00:18:00] you're trying to do it while sitting in a squeaky chair, But. You why we're doing it, and then you twist your body. You're twisting your guts. So sometimes it like little two comes out. 

It's not talked about. And I don't go to hot yoga and I'm in [00:18:15] a big room side.

Chris: [00:18:15] So it's a big secret, like nobody

Mary: [00:18:17] ever talks about

Chris: [00:18:18] it just happens. 

Mary: [00:18:19] It just happens. It's oops. Yeah, no, I really enjoy yoga. I love them. And I've been to different. yoga instructors and some are really. [00:18:30] Really intense. And then some are just like a hug. They're just, it's like really calm. I love gentle yoga. because I just need to simmer down and stretch and it just feels, and it gives you a moment of quiet to just feel your body and feel where your body's at.

[00:18:45] Chris: [00:18:44] Yeah. everything I read about it said, Really helps handle the negative symptoms that come along with. Anxiety. depression. 

sleeplessness even, chronic pain, digestive issues. these are things that can all be helped [00:19:00] in some 

Mary: [00:19:00] way.

Chris: [00:19:00] with yoga. And let's, I'll be honest with you. Any type of activity. Where,

you can fart and it's never discussed.

Mary: [00:19:09] Yeah. 

Chris: [00:19:09] I'm good. I'm good with it. 

Mary: [00:19:10] You're so funny. 

Chris: [00:19:11] I'm on board.

Mary: [00:19:12] I wish you would be on board because I'd love to go to [00:19:15] yoga with you or do 

Chris: [00:19:16] we can do yoga now that we have our gym set up out in the garage. 

Mary: [00:19:20] We

Chris: [00:19:20] videos for the yoga. We can do that. 

Mary: [00:19:22] We can do it. Yeah.

Chris: [00:19:23] So you're going to love this next one.


Mary: [00:19:26] Yes, 

Chris: [00:19:26] that totally. Surprised me when [00:19:30] I read this. Another way to fight anxiety. 

Mary: [00:19:35] Puzzles. Yep.

Chris: [00:19:36] Doing puzzles.

Mary: [00:19:37] Yep. You want to know why? 

Chris: [00:19:39] No. yes. I do. 

Mary: [00:19:41] His first default answer to me all the time is no. Do you want to [00:19:45] watch? No. Do you want us to know. My attitude

Chris: [00:19:48] is very puzzling. 

Mary: [00:19:49] It's puzzling. because you're focused when you can get really focused on something. That's why I usually have a jigsaw puzzle in my classroom pre COVID [00:20:00] because it really helps. Executive function and just those ADHD add kids, they need something they'll also their brain down and bring it back to focusing on one thing instead of the 500 tabs open in the top of their brain. 

[00:20:15] And when I'm stressed. I like to do puzzles in, you'll see puzzles emerged around the house now and then when family comes over. Yeah, get a puzzle out. Because talk [00:20:30] when you talk about stuff. And you're doing a puzzle. There's not really intense eye contact, but people are listening and they're looking for a puzzle piece and it's just a good, it's like driving in the car almost. It's a good [00:20:45] opportunity to just chat with people.

Chris: [00:20:46] I've seen you sit at a table. And just chat for hours with. 


Mary: [00:20:53] Yeah.


Chris: [00:20:54] Neighbors. 

Yeah. And just. do a puzzle and talk and it's It's [00:21:00] just amazing to me. Because it looks so relaxing. And. At the same time, you're like creating these relationships so closely. 

Just through this one thing

Mary: [00:21:14] And I'm

Chris: [00:21:14] sure I [00:21:15] can understand why I would fight anxiety. 

And I think it's like you said, a great distraction, right? So Everything else that's going on in your life, you can have uses.

that as a distraction. And another thing I read about it was you just mentioned it's great thing to do by [00:21:30] yourself, but it's also a great thing to do with somebody else as well. Cause there. There can be all that interaction as well. 

Mary: [00:21:36] Yeah, and it doesn't really matter how old the person is. It was a tiny person who can only do who can't really help. They'll try to find pieces. And [00:21:45] it's just, brings people together and anytime you can do that's good.

Chris: [00:21:49] Yeah.

And so the last thing about puzzles, which I found fascinating. Was that just the satisfaction of locating those pieces. That fit perfectly [00:22:00] together. 

is one of those things that makes it great for anxiety, but another great thing about it is that you can. 


Mary: [00:22:08] Yeah, 

Chris: [00:22:09] go away. 

For an hour, 

Mary: [00:22:11] right. 

Chris: [00:22:12] a day, for a week, for a month. 

And come back to it when you're [00:22:15] anxious again, and it's boom. Yeah. Perfect. 

Mary: [00:22:17] that norepinephrine released when you're looking for that puzzle piece. 

Chris: [00:22:21] Yes. 

Mary: [00:22:22] And you find it. Then you get that burst. 

what I mean? It's cause it's, during the time when you're looking for the piece,

Chris: [00:22:29] Right. 

[00:22:30] Mary: [00:22:29] Is when the norepinephrine, cause it's, you're looking forward to something.

Chris: [00:22:33] Right.

Mary: [00:22:33] And then you find the piece and you're like, haha. 

you throw your hand up yourself a high five,

Chris: [00:22:38] Right.

Mary: [00:22:38] go onto the next piece in this thousand piece thing.

Chris: [00:22:41] Yeah. 

Mary: [00:22:41] 10,000 piece thing. And it's just, it's you have a [00:22:45] feeling of accomplishment when you're done. Except for most of all, our puzzles are missing one piece. 

Chris: [00:22:52] That's life. 

Mary: [00:22:53] And even Harrison's 

That's our puzzle.

Chris: [00:22:55] Yeah. 

what's funny. 

Is that, we do puzzles. I've [00:23:00] seen you guys do puzzles. 

I don't really jump into puzzles. 

But, I think I might try that. 

Because I think it might be something that might be worthwhile for me to do. 

Mary: [00:23:09] We've gotten some really good puzzles. Yeah. 

Chris: [00:23:12] the next thing is another. [00:23:15] An interesting one that I found that totally relates to you. 

And that is swimming. 

So Mary, if you don't know if we've never mentioned it, 

Mary was a swimmer in high school. Very good swimmer. 

Mary: [00:23:29] My whole life since I [00:23:30] was five, but that's

Chris: [00:23:31] And she's also a high school swim coach. 

Which is pretty amazing. 

Swim and dive. Sorry. 


Mary: [00:23:38] the divers out.

Chris: [00:23:39] So obviously Mary likes to swim. 

Mary: [00:23:42] I need a pool. 

Chris: [00:23:43] I've seen Mary swim [00:23:45] across a Lake and back. 

Multiple times. 

Mary: [00:23:48] it's fun.

Chris: [00:23:49] It's pretty amazing. 

but this is really a great anxiety reducer, helps with depression.

Mary: [00:23:55] We need a 


Chris: [00:23:56] releases. 


And that obviously makes you feel 

[00:24:00] good just naturally. Yeah. 

Mary: [00:24:01] It's 

Chris: [00:24:01] it also improves your sleep. 

there's all these benefits from swimming. 

Mary: [00:24:06] Yes. 

Chris: [00:24:06] also, they say, I don't know if this is true or not. 

But they say it is the exercise to do. 

That [00:24:15] will work all of your muscles. 

Mary: [00:24:16] Yes. 

Chris: [00:24:17] From your. 


Mary: [00:24:19] Yep. 

Chris: [00:24:20] To your nose. 

I just made that up. I just made that up. 

Mary: [00:24:24] a great quote. 

Chris: [00:24:24] I don't know if it does. 

Mary: [00:24:25] It does it works. 

A lot of your muscles, 

Chris: [00:24:28] Right. 

Mary: [00:24:28] muscle, especially your [00:24:30] core. 


Chris: [00:24:30] So that's a good thing. 

I saw a report, a study. 

4,000 people, 75% of swimmers reported that it helped reduce their feelings of anxiety. 

And also AIDS. 

in the release of tension. 


[00:24:45] So we have a society, a world. 

Full of people that are depressed. Have a lot of tension in their lives. 


are not more people swimming. If you go to the Y for example, 

You might see [00:25:00] three guys doing laps. 

Mary: [00:25:01] Yeah. 

I think most of the swimmers are there in the morning. 

Chris: [00:25:05] Come on. 

Mary: [00:25:06] 5:00 AM. 

Chris: [00:25:06] Yeah. 

but there's not like a hundred. 

Mary: [00:25:09] No. 

Chris: [00:25:11] don't know why. 

Mary: [00:25:11] more people don't swim. I think [00:25:15] that, in our area it's not as popular because we don't have as much access to pools. 

As another areas in the country. 

Chris: [00:25:23] Okay. 

Mary: [00:25:24] But we should. I grew up in a town with a pool and they just

their pool. After [00:25:30] almost closing it down. 

Chris: [00:25:31] Yeah. 

Mary: [00:25:31] and. 

It's beautiful. And I can't wait to go and compete there when COVID has done being a

Chris: [00:25:36] Yeah. 


so swimming great for anxiety. Great for depression. 

Mary: [00:25:41] and. 

Chris: [00:25:42] Yeah. 

Mary: [00:25:43] and it will [00:25:45] increase your persistence and your resilience and your grit

Chris: [00:25:48] Right.

Mary: [00:25:48] nothing. More nothing that raises your resilience, resiliency. going up and down a pool lane. 


Chris: [00:25:57] Yeah. 

Mary: [00:25:58] you think all your thoughts, [00:26:00] you sing all your songs in your head. And you're just going back and forth. And that. Redundancy in that rhythm of it and the rhythm of your breathing and the rhythm of the stroke, which is like the breathing and swimming in the breathing in yoga. 

Chris: [00:26:14] Yeah. 

[00:26:15] Mary: [00:26:14] are the same types of things. Is that attunes your body,

Chris: [00:26:19] Right. 

Mary: [00:26:20] I, 

Chris: [00:26:21] I see. 

Mary: [00:26:21] the girls that I coach and I see the change in their character from the beginning of the season to the end of the season.

Chris: [00:26:27] Yeah. 

Mary: [00:26:28] I know that it's part of being a team [00:26:30] sport, but I also know that it's, because of the conditioning of being in the pool,


Chris: [00:26:33] you remember how I mentioned that a lot of these things. 

that I found about that deal with anxiety, help you deal with anxiety or things that I don't really want to do. Yeah. This is probably swimming is [00:26:45] probably the highest on my list. 

Mary: [00:26:46] Why is that though? You weren't raised around pools though. We're you

Chris: [00:26:50] No, but I swam a lot as a kid. 

And I enjoyed it, but I think it's just cause I'm old. 

Maybe, I don't know.

Mary: [00:26:57] body shame stuff. I don't know

[00:27:00] Chris: [00:26:59] What's that supposed to mean? I'm just saying that.

Mary: [00:27:02] a lot of people don't like to swim because they don't like the way they look in a swimsuit. I think you'd look great in a Speedo. 

Chris: [00:27:09] Okay. You're making. 


Mary: [00:27:11] Uncomfortable. 

Chris: [00:27:11] uncomfortable.

Mary: [00:27:12] conversation. But, [00:27:15] I. there is a swimmer body. 


Chris: [00:27:19] I don't have one. 

Mary: [00:27:22] I can see. our state superintendent's wife was a swimmer. And. 

She still looks like a swimmer

[00:27:30] Chris: [00:27:29] Yeah.

Mary: [00:27:30] think she still does swim. 

But I can walk behind people at the airport and go. a swimmer.

Chris: [00:27:36] Right. 

Mary: [00:27:36] That's a swimmer. 

Chris: [00:27:37] Yeah. 

Mary: [00:27:38] being a swimmer means that you don't want to ever go shopping. Cause it didn't, then it causes anxiety because none of your clothes fit. Because [00:27:45] you're built like a quarterback.

Chris: [00:27:46] Yeah. 

Mary: [00:27:46] So anyway, now I've gone off topic. What's the next thing?

Chris: [00:27:50] the last one is coloring. 

Which I know I make fun of you. 

Mary: [00:27:55] this 

Chris: [00:27:55] No, I make fun of you and Jacqueline a lot because you guys like to color. 

[00:28:00] Which with adult coloring books. 

if you can go to Costco. 

you can find tons of adult coloring books are now. 

Mary: [00:28:07] Sometimes. 

Chris: [00:28:08] and some of the other bookstores probably have them as well. 

I just don't get [00:28:15] it. I get. 

I get that. It's good for anxiety. 

Mary: [00:28:19] Right. 

Chris: [00:28:19] I get why you do it. 

But I just. I don't know, it just seems It just seems like over the edge a little bit. 



Mary: [00:28:28] I have two sets of gel [00:28:30] pens, and one is, regular 

Chris: [00:28:33] And why. 

If you're going to color in a coloring book, why do you use pens and crayons? 

Mary: [00:28:37] because pens are more. Specific and they make sharper lines. 

Chris: [00:28:42] is it, does it make it easier to stay within the [00:28:45] lines? 

Mary: [00:28:45] meticulous. 

Chris: [00:28:46] Oh, 

Mary: [00:28:46] And I like my, I like to color with sparkle gel pens,

Chris: [00:28:53] Okay.

Mary: [00:28:53] it to be shiny when it's done.

Chris: [00:28:55] Alright. 

And how does that help you with anxiety? 

Mary: [00:28:58] I don't, it's better [00:29:00] than I like also like to paint, that,

the there's no stress in a picture. Like you pick a pretty picture that you want to paint. 

And then you just color it. It's brainless, except for you're strategizing and thinking about [00:29:15] complimentary stuff and how you want it to look. And you

in your head how you want it to look. 

At the end and then you go from there.

Chris: [00:29:21] Sure. 

Mary: [00:29:21] Versus painting as you are the creator of the whole thing. And it's just you want, you have to think of all the steps,

Chris: [00:29:27] Right.

Mary: [00:29:28] there's one step. You just have to color [00:29:30] it in. 

Chris: [00:29:30] Makes sense. 

Mary: [00:29:31] and not read how to inc.



Chris: [00:29:34] I guess coloring, the one thing I think about with coloring is at least you, when you're done. 

You have this beautiful picture that you can frame or do whatever with, [00:29:45] but with a puzzle. 

You can look at it for a while. Maybe you could frame it, 

or you can just tear it apart. 

Mary: [00:29:50] Yeah.

Chris: [00:29:51] again. 

Mary: [00:29:51] Yeah. 

it's pretty, once the PO puzzle sits out and is displayed mostly unfinished. 

And then you finish it and you're like, 

[00:30:00] Chris: [00:30:00] Wow. 

Mary: [00:30:00] that was fun. And then you put it back in the 


you try to really get all the pieces taken apart because you don't want to cheat by starting from like already put together pieces the next time. 

Chris: [00:30:09] Right. 

Mary: [00:30:10] yeah.

Chris: [00:30:10] Yeah, so everything I read about coloring great for anxiety. Great for depression, just like all these [00:30:15] other things just blows me away. 

If you are out there and feeling anxious or having anxiety issues, please. Go see a doctor, first of all. 

And, look into some ways that you can maybe fight that anxiety. 


Do [00:30:30] you have a quote for today? I thought I heard you say you had a quote. 

Mary: [00:30:35] My quote of the day is from

Chris: [00:30:36] Abraham.

Mary: [00:30:37] Lincoln. 

And it's a real Abraham Lincoln quote. 

Here it is.

Chris: [00:30:42] Okay. 

Mary: [00:30:42] If I were two faced. What [00:30:45] I'd be wearing this one?

Chris: [00:30:46] Huh, that's a good one. 

Mary: [00:30:48] Abraham

Chris: [00:30:49] a good one. 

Mary: [00:30:50] He's so great.

Chris: [00:30:51] Yeah. 


 Mary: [00:30:51] Thanks 

Chris: [00:30:52] for joining us. 

Mary: [00:30:52] this week. We'd like to get to know 

Chris: [00:30:54] More of our listeners.

Mary: [00:30:55] and would love it. If you would reach out and ask us a question or leave us a [00:31:00] comment@speakpipe.com/WDHT.  We Think having conversations with all of you can really add to the show and we'd love to hear from you. can also join our VIP list by texting [00:31:15] WDHTPOD To 44222.

Chris: [00:31:21] Thanks. 

Mary: [00:31:21] And we'll talk to you. Next week.